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This
series was created with respect to the notoriety the news media
has given to the Michigan Militia, the Branch Davidians of Waco,
Heaven's
Gate, and the Montana Freemen, as well as the late followers of Jim
Jones.
As a public service, we have decided to utilize this space to alert
our readers to new and growing organizations whose followers are
religiously dedicated. The followers of cults typically make sacrifices
to be a part of the group, and will fight in defense of its honor.
Of course, since our publication comes out every other month, that
leaves six months a year without a specified Cult of the Month.
But we thought that this tag line was a little catchier than Cult
of Every Other Month.
Kroger
Plus Shopper's Card
Apple
Computer
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Kroger
Plus Shopper's Card
As
part of a massive campaign to grow enlistment their army, the grocery
store chain has accosted their followers with a barrage of advertising
as they return the Temple of Kroger each week. Kroger collects the
names and addresses of each of their faithful, and in return offer
their membership the promise of lower priced groceries than the rest
of the uninitiated masses.
Cult member
Amy Nichols,
a hairstylist at Kaleidoscope, is originally from California. She
moved to Louisville years ago, unsuspecting of the web of seduction
Kroger would weave into her life and the lives of her friends and
family.
Most Kroger Plus Shopper's Club members are willing participants,
blinded by the guise of discounts, proudly displaying the Kroger
key chain tag to identify themselves to other members. The organization
has faced little opposition and the key chain tags have succeeded
in putting the Kroger name into everyday experiences that were previously
devoid of advertising. Here's a look inside the mind of a dedicated
follower:
How did you first become interested in this cult?
Well, I went to Kroger one day, totally oblivious of the fact
that there was a new cult. And, of course, I walked through the door
and immediately there's the booth stood up. You know, like everybody's
ready, standing in line. I bypass it. I got no time for that. And
pretty much on every aisle there were people standing there pushing
it on me. So, by the end of my shopping trip, I realized that they
were just trying to help me out. They were just trying to get me
a little savings.
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Cult
member Amy Nichols
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Do your
parents support your decision to be a part of this cult?
I didn't tell them at first, because I didn't think it
was any of their business. But I went home to visit California last
summer and I was reaching in my mom's wallet to get some money
- because I like to take her money instead of using mine - and I found
a cult card in her wallet as well, from a sister store. So I knew that
everything would be okay after that.
What are the biggest sacrifices you have to make to be a part of
the group?
Hmm. Well, a lot of people think that the Kroger card keeps you
down. You know, they think that it's a way that people can find
you. And all I'm saying is that I've got nothing to be ashamed
of. I'm a member of the Kroger [Plus Shopper's] Card and I'm
proud of it.
Who
is seen as the cult leader? And add anything you might be able tell
us about him or her.
I've never actually seen the leader of the cult. I know that
he's bigger than I am - or she - but you've got to have
faith when it comes to that. All I know is that there's savings
involved, and family, and I want to be a part of that.
What are the rules that exist in this secret society?
Well, you've got to have your card with you at all times,
because they won't just believe you if you just say that you
have the card. So they give you one for your purse and they give
you one that you can hang on your key chain for emergency purposes.
So I think that the rules are pretty limited to that. You have to
believe in the savings, and you have to believe in Kroger.
Is this movement peaceful or violent?
It's very peaceful. It's the grocery store so, you know,
there's not a lot of room for violence in our group.
How
many followers does this organization have?
Thousands. Widespread.
Does this cult practice any sort of recruiting, and if so, what
form does it take?
Initially, I think in the beginning, tons of recruiting. You
couldn't
go anywhere without people talking about it. It's mellowed out
a little bit because I think that it's really caught on. And,
you know, people are ready for something like this.
How do people usually take it when you tell them that you are a
part of this organization?
Most people embrace it. Today, actually, I was talking to a fellow
employee of mine who was telling me that there are people out there
that really discourage you having the Card. And I don't understand
that. I really don't understand that at all.
Who are the enemies of this movement?
The non-members, I guess. The people that... they're not
welcoming it. All I'm saying is that, seriously, they're
just trying to give you a little freedom for some savings, and just
some unity as customers in general, and who doesn't want that?!
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Apple
Computer, Inc.
This
month we focus on an organization whose membership has
spread around the world. In a short twenty years, its millions of followers
have faced changing times and yet always have led a tireless campaign
to convert new followers.
Our interview is with cult member Ronald
Jasin,
a graphic designer who, as you'll see, has been a dedicated member
of the Church of Apple for his entire adult life.
How
did you first become interested in this cult?
My interest in the organization started at an early age. I believe
I was ten or eleven when I first became aware of this great movement.
Although I haven't always been loyal through the years, the
interest was always there, and eventually I did come back.
Do your parents support your decision to be a part of this cult?
Yes, my mother is very supportive of my
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Apple
IIc computer |
decision
to be involved in this wonderful movement. Actually, my parents are
responsible for my involvement. My first experience with Apple was
back in 1984 when my parents decided to purchase our first family computer,
an Apple IIc. Although my parents never became completely converted,
I don't believe I've been
the same since.
What are the biggest sacrifices you have to make to be a part of
the group?
Not being able to dance along with those cute little spacemen in
the Intel commercials. Also the fact that I can never speak to an uncle
of mine. He has disowned me due to my involvement with Apple, or the
inferior little toy, as he likes to put it.
Who is seen as the cult leader? And add anything you might be able
tell us about him or her.
The leader? If I had to name one person I guess I'd have to
say Steve Jobs. But there are many in the hierarchy of the organization.
I don't know much about Mr. Jobs. I can tell you that after a
long absence from the movement, he has come back to help us advance
the movement and get more people involved.
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1984: original
Macintosh (128k)
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1986: Macintosh
Plus
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1995: Power Macintosh
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1999: G4 Macintosh
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1999: iBook
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What are the rules that exist in this
secret society?
There aren't many rules. I would say only two. You must have
an Apple logo sticker on your automobile, to identify yourself to others.
And you must be loyal, very loyal.
Is this movement peaceful or violent?
I would say the movement is peaceful. But like all organizations
I'm sure militant factions exists.
Who are the enemies of this movement?
There are many enemies, but I would have to say the biggest enemy
to the movement is ignorance. That and an unwillingness to acknowledge
a superior operating system.
How many followers does this organization have?
I couldn't give you an exact number. I'm sure it's
well over 1,000.
Does this cult practice any sort of recruiting, and if so, what form
does it take?
Apple has many different forms of recruiting. In the recent past
they enlisted the help of many famous and highly respected individuals,
like Frank Sinatra, Jim Henson and Ansel Adams, just to name a few.
More recently, Apple has decided to appeal to a more primal instinct.
Appealing to people's senses by making the computers brightly colored
and giving them fruity names like blueberry and tangerine.
This tactic seems to be working very well - much like a shiny fishing
lure - Apple is reeling in the new recruits... Many of who seem to be
younger, which ensures Apple's staying power for a long time to
come. Hopefully, these new recruits will mature and eventually give
birth to a whole new generation of followers.
How do people usually take it when you tell them that you are a part
of this organization?
Most people just don't get it. I receive a lot of smiles and
pleasant nods when I tell people about my involvement. I think there's
some pity also. People, I think, feel sorry for me because they believe
that maybe there's no hope for me. Like I'm too far gone to
be saved. But I don't think there's any problem. I'm
happy with my involvement.
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